Someone once asked me what my mother's greatest legacy to me was, Arundhati Roy said at a recent gathering in Delhi. I said an overactive middle finger. This humorous remark serves as an entry point into Roy's new memoir, 'Mother Mary Comes to Me', a tribute to her mother, Mary Roy, who was a feminist icon, educator, and a complex personality in her own right.
Roy's memoir is not a simple eulogy; instead, it portrays the raw, often tumultuous relationship she shared with her mother, describing it as a respectful relationship between two nuclear powers—marked by its push and pull dynamics. Each chapter reflects on the struggles and inspirations that shaped both women, with Roy remarking, Living with my mother was a survival act. She likens herself to a dual observer and participant, stating, One half of me was taking the hit and the other half of me was taking notes.
Mary Roy's legacy is multifaceted; she walked out of her marriage to create a renowned school in Kerala and became a pioneer for women’s rights, winning a landmark Supreme Court case on inheritance rights for Christians. Yet, she was also a fiercely demanding mother who instilled both pride and dread in her children. Since then, all personal achievement comes with a sense of foreboding, Roy writes, poignantly linking her mother’s reactions with the complexities of her own identity as a writer.
This memoir is described as a reportage of the heart, focusing on the eccentricities and humor of both their lives, intertwining Roy's journey through architecture and literature against the backdrop of her mother's indomitable spirit. Roy has spent years writing passionately about social justice, and through this memoir, she encapsulates the essence of how her childhood shaped her values and voice. She reflects on the absurdities of life and the profound impact of music and literature, integrating a soundtrack that resonates with her identity.
As she launched her memoir to a crowd in Kochi, her brother paid tribute through a heartfelt musical performance, evoking the familial bond that continues to inspire her work. Through 'Mother Mary Comes to Me', Roy doesn't just mourn her mother but celebrates the complexity of their relationship, ensuring the legacy of both women lives on.
