In brief
A personal reflection on learning mahjong highlights the challenges of stepping outside comfort zones, while uncovering opportunities for community engagement through shared experiences.
One afternoon last week, I invited a friend to join me for a lesson in Hong Kong-style mahjong at a local restaurant in Brooklyn. The allure of the game had long captivated me, from its colorful bakelite tiles to the pleasant clattering sounds of the pieces. My mother, an avid player of the American version, participates in a weekly game with her friends—a ritual that left me yearning for my own regular gathering.We found ourselves among 15 other beginners, diving into a practice round where all the tiles were flipped over to familiarize ourselves with their values while our instructor guided us through the foundational elements of the game. He explained how to set up the table, the significance of the suit tiles, honor tiles, and the maneuvering of dragons and winds that collectively shape mahjong.I soon discovered that learning this intricate game wasn't straightforward. Our teacher provided thorough explanations, but even as familiar concepts began to surface, I struggled to grasp the mechanics: three identical tiles form a pung? My confusion peaked when I realized another player emerged victorious while I was lost in the details of flower tiles. As I grappled with my inadequacy, a nagging thought crept in: why was I attempting to learn this new game when I already knew many others that I seldom played? My inner dialogue wrestled with discomfort, questioning whether adding this new pursuit was wise given my busy life.To my surprise, days later, my friend informed me that she had purchased a mahjong set. “Now we just need two other people to play,” she said, enthusiasm sparking my memory of our first lesson. Reflecting on my initial desire to walk out due to my poor grasp of the game, I realized that being inexperienced can be daunting. It’s easy to gravitate toward activities that affirm our skills, that allow us to shine without the worry of stumbling.Yet, this invitation signified more than just another game—it presented the opportunity to form connections with others in a shared experience of growth and fun. Embracing the challenge of being novices together opened doors to community and perhaps even a vibrant new hobby that mirrored the camaraderie I admired in my mother's gatherings. Embracing discomfort with openness could lead to the rewarding rituals I had been seeking all along.
